Saturday, July 21, 2012

The Infernos of Hades Are Upon Thee

Today's mis-adventure began with the temperature @ 93 F with the timepiece showing 10:16am at Cedar Hill State Parkery. My plan was to complete 8 miles and to obtain great feats of poor endurance. With the thermometer rising and knowingly accepting the fact that my family members in Amarillo are giggling at what they consider a cold front, I embarked on my journey with little confidence that I would be successful at any stretch of my feeble imagination.
The trail was sparsely populated upon my start probably due to the fact few people are apt to exercise in such heated conditions. My plan was to run 2 miles and walk 1 and then continue alternating in such manner until I either completed the run (8 miles) or was found unconscious on the trail. Either outcome would be considered a success.
I completed the first 2 miles with minimal effort and with a rare showing of restraint, I walked the next mile.
The temperature began to rise at faster increments when I began mile 4 and after 4.8 miles, I decided that a good walk would be not only refreshing, but also consistent to not be fast. At this time I noticed that my hydration bladder was getting lighter so I decided that pushing my limited abilities could be catastrophic.
I fast walked the rest of the trail mixed with some running and felt fortunate upon its completion because the temperature had risen to a chilly 98 degrees and would soon be a chillier 106. I finished my hydration means one half mile from the end of the trail and staggered out with audible gasps from gathered trail fans. With good fortune and planning, I had additional hydration nearby that provided great relief and and a weakened dance of unenergetic enthusiasm. I attempted to skip gayly to the nearby water fountain to rinse off, but my efforts resembled a bath salted addict searching for a face to eat after being up for 7 days straight.
I do have some news that will provide you great pleasure. My runs can now be tracked on Map My Run. If you can friend Ultra Idiot on Map My Run, you can track my runs as they take place. It will be like virtually watching me suffer. I feel this would bring great enjoyment to all who wish to do so. And additionally, if you see a prolonged halt in movement, you can inform the proper authorities of my location!
My next run is tomorrow morning @ 8am. You could easily track my progress while visiting your chosen churchery! How exciting!
I have attached a screen shot of today's run!

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