A Weekend Off Yields an Epic Idea!

I knowingly entered the previous weekend with many doubts that any training would occur due to the complexity of the weekend's activities and my prognosis was indeed accurate. By the time I was in a position to train last night, I had run out of daylight to train in. Thus I resigned to my sleeping quarters to peruse my plan for the following week and to contemplate what I could do physically and mentally to ensure myself of a DFL finish.
After a long study of my previous training of which lasted a good 2 minutes, I discovered 2 issues that would need attention. The first issue was an overall improvement in my endurance which I feel will be accomplished with continued training.
The 2nd issue I noticed was the effect that gastic events was having on my training. I decided to focus my attention on this very issue and came up with a very workable solution. I will attack this weakness with a 2 pronged plan.
The first attack will be centered on my current diet. Perhaps a look into my caloric intake and quality will have a positive effect on my current training. Thus I will energetically research current diet trends and see to what level visits to local Taco Bell eateries can aid me in achieving my training objectives.
Secondly, I came to the conclusion that I needed to be prepared for gastric events should they occur during my race. With the chance of Necessary Rooms being split up to 5 miles apart, I feel that a backup plan will be in order so that should a gastric event incur during the race, I will be able to handle such event with ease and confidence. Using a form of diapery seems like a logical solution, yet the possibility of chafing caused me great fear. With some quick research I found an alternative plan that will enable me to handle almost any ghastly event! I found a vehicle that could follow me around that will allow me to dispose of any Necessary Needs while on the trail. It is very similar to a Temporary Necessary Module, yet wheeled! A most incredible invention!
This solution does not come without its challenges however and this is where you, my loyal reader and supporter come into play! I will be in need of a volunteer to drive this vehicle behind me and keep it at the ready should need of it be Necessary. What better way to enjoy the race and be involved in a most worthy cause than by supporting a below average runner for 8 hours by driving the vehicle pictured below behind myself with words of encouragement! An excellent way to partipate in a sporting activity without the risk of fatigue or injury!
Anyone is interested, please reply to this blog or email me! Should there be more than one person who desires participation in such a worthwhile cause (which I am sure will be the case), we could either have a friendly competition or if the candidates do not wish to compete, the drivers could work in alternating shifts so to allow as many particpants as Necessary to enjoy the wonderous aroma of nature and the beautiful outdoors!
Reply quickly for a I fear the spots will be taken quickly!